A Colourful Life of Colourful People

Monday, July 31, 2006

did i ever mention i detest talking to maddie?
she always make me think--too much. Say i'm living in a denial. But what she says always make me think about the past, making me even more uncertain about the present.

Ah well, i just need to know i'm hype and happy the way i am now.

=] gotta go mug. bye!!

I had a real good time @ 4:32 PM
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Sunday, July 30, 2006

TADAH!! i'm here to blog!! (Obviously)

Lyn came to my house yesterday and we studied. =]

The strong wind nearly blew us away. It was highly amusing looking at lyn chasing after the paper.

Someone give me inspiration! i don't know how to design the webpage! and to think i thought posters were sufficient to drain my life away-.-

the RI chinese paper was easy. i thought it was gonna kill me. Haha =]

Waiting for tuition...
wait..
wait..
wait..
gah!

I had a real good time @ 1:46 PM
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Friday, July 28, 2006

Today's friday. another redundant statement.

I screwed my Literature test, which was on unseen prose. I suck when it comes to unseen prose. I can never get to catch the gist of the entire extract. So when i don't catch the gist, i crap all i can just to fill up the empty foolscap paper. I prefer poems =]

I managed to SEE the angles for circles' test!! HAHAHA!!

I went to Kinokuniya to get my mama's birthday present. I'm happy with what i got her. I hope she likes it though it might be a tad too expensive for something not exactly very practical. But i just think it's something she would like. It's like. 4 days to her birthday. I can't wait to give it to her!! I got lost in the big big shop.

I bought nice chocolate bread for my family. To be specific, for my sis. I think she likes it.

Zhaohan kept laughing. I glared at him and he apologised. Weiyi, Lyn and i couldn't help but burst out laughing. We aren't mean or anything. It's just highly amusing.

Tomorrow's gonna be fun! Lyn and my laughter will fill the void deck of Block 332. =]

I had a real good time @ 4:20 PM
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Thursday, July 27, 2006

i'm in an uber whiney mood today. klyn's fault!

I went to school today. (this statement is redundant actually)
me: *taps alfred's right shoulder, standing on his left*
Alfred: *turns right, turns left, Sighs* another boring day at school
Me: ....
Alfred: Another boring day seeing mabel
Me: *walks off*

There's no drama club today!

i have a problem with my speech.
"Did you lock your vinegar?"
"Snob Snorting!"
"YONG GIN!" (supposed to be yong jin)

Tongue tied. I can't type properly either.

Siian: *Snorts* (it's actually due to his flu)
Me: Snob...Sn..Stop Snorting!
Siian: *shakes head*
Siian: *Snorts*
Me: Can you PLEASE blow your nose?
Siian: *shakes head*
Siian: *Snorts*
Me: Can you PLEASE blow your nose?
Siian: *shakes head*
Me: *Passes tissue to him* PLEASE blow your nose!
Siian: *Shakes head*
Me: gah!
Siian: *smiles* (because he managed to irritate me. Basically he's just trying to be irritating all along.

Adidas=Chicken feet in the Phillipines

(On msn)
Weiyi: yo! i thought u were lyn. Because of the squids
Me:ooooo
Me: SEND ME THE SONGS!!!!
Weiyi:omg i feel like im talking to lyn

We're twins!!

Yongjin is my new entertainment centre. =]

I SWEAR TO STUDY HARD HARD!!

There are two tests tomorrow. And what am i doing here? GAH!

Mocha! Fruit punch+Barcadi+Brandy!! NICE!!!! HAHA

it's this little teeny weenybit of emptiness, most probably because i'm used to it. but then again, i don't feel happy there. so what's the point? Yea, i managed to answer that very simple question with a simple answer from the bottom of my heart,

I had a real good time @ 4:03 PM
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Wednesday, July 26, 2006

I feel accomplished today because i made Yongjin run like mad. HAHA. kidding.

It's because i reached home at three, went to sun plaza with mom, photocopied her books, then borrowed books from the library, went to NTUC to buy french beans and a big big watermelon then to sportslink to get my new racket [but i forgot to get shuttlecocks] and i reached home at 4, which is the normal time i would reach home. it only took me an hour to do so many things. im easily contented ^^

i had two tests which required me to write a lot a lot and i could see the change in the ink level of my pen -.-

after PE i nearly rolled down the stairs. literally. was trodding up six horrible levels, laughed and nearly dropped down.-.-

my school's water cooler got contaminated by hydrochloric acid.=.=

KUOLYN'S BACK IT SCHOOL!!! WOOTS!! lol.

I just find this amusing. most won't get the joke though. But it's for the sake of memories anyway.
Miss koh: show your love for your friends...
Me: i love you *sniggers*
Lyn: i think you should start to question your own sexual tendencies
Me: OH! I LOOOVEE YOU!!!!
Lyn: Erm. Maybe we should stop being such GOOD friends
Me: yea. Let's be BETTER friends
Us: *ROTFL*

Me: *taps lyn*
Lyn: wait *talks to weiyi*
Me: *turns back to read papers*
Lyn: what?
me: i forgot what i wanted to say
us: *ROTFL*

Siian: *blabbers his BBC information*
me: CAN YOU JUST KEEP QUIET!! STUDY LA!
siian: *continues blabbering*
Me: i'm trying to study!! Pfffft.... *covers mouth to prevent word from coming out*
Ros, lyn, siian: rotfl

Yes, bottomline of three stories: i laugh a lot when lyn is present. rather, WE laugh a lot when we're together.

pacifiers. i think they're cute.

i was talking to mama about why people have children like 15 years apart
Me: very weird leh, how come some people got one child for a long long time then 15 years later get another baby again when they're so old.
she told me: it's karma, some things cannot be prevented, not that they want it.
me: but it's just so weird...

i think i know what i miss about thailand. i miss durians.

EVERYONE!! CHEERIOS!!! *starts throwing cheerios everywhere* EAT MORE CHEERIOS AND BE CHEERFUL!!

Life's just so much better after learning to be cheerful and happy, finding a goal and motivation, and not living in a dilemma anymore! hahahah!!

I had a real good time @ 4:48 PM
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Tuesday, July 25, 2006

all that's in my head:
-i wanna do real good for my upcoming Common Tests/Class Tests
-My foot hurts!
-I made people laugh/smile today. And i'm VERY happy.
-i have many many tests tomorrow. Tomorrow is a bad day.
-I feel very weird without Kuolyn's existence for one pathetic day.
-I like Chemistry, Physics and Maths!
-I'm like. Really really happy although the day sucked. But i'm really happy! and i don't know why!
-Lyn's coming on sat! Yongjin's joining us for badminton!! WOOHOO!
-I can't believe yongjin does Volunteer at SN mission home!
-I'm really happy i have someone to talk to almost everyday.
-I'm really happy i finallymade boring jh smile at my twist! [or at least i THINK i saw him laughign secretly]
-yay! someone spotted my nice handwriting on his tb! finally!
-did i tell you i'm gonna study real hard?
-Today's the 7th lunar month's first day! i just realised.
-Tuition was cancelled because i nearly DIED of exhaustion
-it's ten minutes to nine. bye!
-LOL

I had a real good time @ 8:47 PM
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Monday, July 24, 2006

i got STUCKED outside my home sweet home for three and a half whole hours because my sis took my keys and didn't return and mum went to Novena and yada yada. Oh well, at least i managed to read and revise JLC since its common test is on 1st of August.

And lyn's not attending school tomorrow. I'm so sad!!! *Yea im totally obsessed with her. WAHAHA* anyway, good luck to you!

Then i dropped by 308 to return Dawn her SS textbook, and i saw someone's chinese textbook open, big and wide. So i decided to be nice and wrote "Pacifier =]" on it. haha. i was just being high la.

To those who've been having bad days like Chufeng, CHEERIOS!

Ros whines a lot. haha. XD

Si Ian is evil. He keeps smashing the ball during badminton though it was supposed to be casual play.

El was cancelled and switched to tuesday instead. My juniors were all close to murdering me. MISS KOH!!!

Ah well, life's good today despite a few misfortunes like getting stuck outside home.

My foot hurts! but who cares!

BLACK PAPPER CHICKEN!! haha...dinner! i'm so hungry. Yum yum.

yea mad, thanks for your support in my decision.

I got the adrenalin in me pumping and rushing to study study study! I like it. HAHA!

Physics! 20 outta 25! so happy. *GRINS* Although i missed the ENTIRE chapter and didn't get back my remedial due to Miss Koh and Miss J's reluctance for me to pon EL and attend the remedial's remedial. I THINK i make sense la huh.

"O-H-M-Y-G-O-D-I-M-O-N-F-I-R-E!"
"I hear the screams of the vegetables.."

Pardon my insanity. i am insane.

I had a real good time @ 7:49 PM
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Sunday, July 23, 2006

i sincerely apologise if i have been blogging far too much but i just want to blabber and rant my head off.

Tuition just ended and it nearly murdered dawn and i. The tuition teacher's still floating somewhere in my house though. so i better not badmouth him here. Kidding. Oh well, tuition always makes me hungry and here comes my rescue: KoKoKrunch!

Anyway, did i tell you how the fantasy of Flying Squids and Co as well as the handsign came by? If i did say it before, i shall repeat myself anyway because i find it highly amusing. I was running this disgusting flu and was sleeping my head off during free periods. So when i woke up after a couple of hours of sleep, i was ~~a little~~ extremely blur and when rosary talked to me, i told her: Flying Squids and Company *twists*. lol.

im gng back to play sth. to destress. haha. shan't tell you what is it!

I had a real good time @ 4:36 PM
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It was just this very simple question that someone asked me: The thing is, do you like going there?

and it set me pondering. honestly i don't know. there are stuff about it i like, but it seems that there's more which i dislike. oh well. who knows i can find a happier me. =] i'm sure i will!

I had a real good time @ 1:05 PM
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I wanted to complete my Literature essay last night but i started talking to Jinhong and Victor Teo, i went high on both and forgot about my essay, which was half completed.

I want to do exceptionally well for my Common Tests this time round. Can i?

I want to be able to forget, let go and leave the place. I will.

I want to stop procrastinating. I can't!

I want to be happy and I am!

i'm feeling so carefree, a burden off my mind.

[Rush by Aly and AJ]
[Where'd you go by Fort Minor]
[Bad day by Daniel Powter]
[Free loop by Daniel Powter]
[The entire *Emancipation* CD]

I shall complete my literature essay and i WILL. *GRINS*

I had a real good time @ 11:34 AM
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Saturday, July 22, 2006

i super feel like sleeping today. Oh well

Bad Day

Where is the moment when we need it the most
You kick up the leaves and the magic is lost
They tell me your blue sky's faded to grey
They tell me your passion's gone away
And I don't need no carrying on

You stand in the line just to hit a new low
You're faking a smile with the coffee to go
You tell me your life's been way off line
You're falling to pieces every time
And I don't need no carrying on

Cause you had a bad day
You're taking one down
You sing a sad song just to turn it around
You say you don't know
You tell me don't lie
You work at a smile and you go for a ride
You had a bad day
The camera don't lie
You're coming back down and you really don't mind
You had a bad day
You had a bad day

Well you need a blue sky holiday
The point is they laugh at what you say
And I don't need no carrying on

You had a bad day
You're taking one down
You sing a sad song just to turn it around
You say you don't know
You tell me don't lie
You work at a smile and you go for a ride
You had a bad day
The camera don't lie
You're coming back down and you really don't mind
You had a bad day
You had a bad day

Sometimes the system goes on the blink and the whole thing it turns out
Wrong
You might not make it back and you know that you could be well oh that
Strong
Well I'm not wrong

So where is the passion when you need it the most
Oh you and I
You kick up the leaves and the magic is lost

Cause you had a bad day
You're taking one down
You sing a sad song just to turn it around
You say you don't know
You tell me don't lie
You work at a smile and you go for a ride
You had a bad day
You see what you like
And how does it feel, one more time
You had a bad day
You had a bad day
You had a bad day

It's like, i finally managed to come upon a decision.

I had a real good time @ 7:50 PM
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For the past few days, a lot a lot of people have been asking me how the hell do i stay high, crazy and happy for the whole day. So i've been repeating the same answer for a few times: Don't sleep at night, drink coffee, and tadah! Kidding. Yea i tell them that, but it's just for laughs. I do tell them how i keep myself high and going.Well, at least it works for lyn and i. HAHA.

Don't follow me. I'm an extremely bad example. I'm not saying i sacrifice my sleep just for the sake of being high. that's insane. But it's just normal for me to not sleep because i have work to do, drink coffee in the morning to keep myself awake during class and i'll automatically turn real high.

Anyway i think a goal/motivation is extremely important to make one a happy person. For me, my motivation is to see people around me real happy. So basically i will just fling my sadness off and just do stupid things, crap a lot, be a clown, joker, lamo, and make people laugh! So by doing so, they smile and i feel really contented. No doubt there will be points of our lives that make us down, but who cares? Just be happy anyway! hahaha...

if there's something to bring me down, then go home, reflect, sort things out, and be even HAPPIER!

sorry im still high. =.= perhaps because of the presence of soya bean milk, which i've been deeply infatuated with. LOL

I had a real good time @ 11:23 AM
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Friday, July 21, 2006

seriously i don't know what's gonna happen if.
so i'm gonna give it a try before i decide. -.-

souless. ha. no way man!

my shoulder hurts a lot today. no idea why.
going back to sembawang primary tomorrow. finally.

I had a real good time @ 8:36 PM
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Two extreme signs people would show when i show them my "Flying Squid and Co." sign:
-for EXTREMELY boring people like, jh, they just stare at me, turn head back and dao me. hmph.
-Another person whom i showed it to smiled at me. =] it feels really heartwarming to make people smile. Oh, and mrs chang laughed again today. =]

Weird, i had more sleep last time but i'm more sloggish today. Like, reach the table, Piak on it and sleep. Lyn's worse though.

Had geography test. Wasn't THAT bad but i still think i'm going to flunk it.

The statistical poster! i am very very very happy i got it done. The sacrifice of my sleep was super worth it! =] feel accomplished.

I had a real good time @ 4:38 PM
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Thursday, July 20, 2006

I don't know if today is a good or bad day, but i shall think on the bright side. Despite the fact that i was hopelessly tired because i stayed up till 3.30am last night to complete the statistical poster design and therefore only had two pathetic hours of sleep, i had an extremely happy day.

First off the list, i went to school with a lopsided mind. So Lyn and i went high on mrs chang during the morning assembly. Both of us were like: ice cream ice cream..you owe us ice cream and we burst out laughing. But it's nice to see Mrs Chang laugh at our insanity. She's always so stressed up and when we see that she's actually laughing because we're being insane, it feels very good, like, you made a person smile!

Then as we were making our miserable way up the six stories to our classroom, i could hardly walk in what you call, a straight line. Then for a moment i simply lost my mind and started laughing for no reason. In short, i just burst out into an uncontrollable laughter and no reasons or factors actually spurred the occurence of the laughter. First sign of insanity.

During literature, Ms J brought us down to the sculpture garden for the lesson. We were supposed to find an item from the sacred box of hers and explain why it would represent a pair of mother and daughter in the JLC. So inspiration just popped up in lyn and my head and we came up with this cute skit of me poking lyn with the traditional chinese fan. After that we were required to compose a song/jingle to describe the JLC. No idea how and why, lyn and i got the inspiration almost immediately and it went, to the tune of "I am cow",

"I am mom
Hear me talk
I know twice as much as you
And i look good when i talk to you
Yoghurt, Curd Cream, Cheese and butter come from shelves from off my kitchen
I am mom
I am mom
Hear me talk...."

I'm even more addicted to this song now. XD

Three other great things happened today:
-I talked to elaine.
-I had a chat with Bozhao, realised he was nice and friendly and able to take jokes! [and understand my super lame jokes]
-I talked to valentina.

In short, i made three new friends today. ^^

Casting in El was draining. Gah. I just lost control and shouted at the noisy bunch. Feel so bad =(

I had a real good time @ 7:30 PM
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Monday, July 17, 2006

don't ask me why but i've been going on a blogging spree (and badminton spree) for this couple of days. As i said, don't ask me why; i don't know why either. I played a total of three sessions of badminton in theorectically, less than 24 hours, though it is two seperate days.

So bertina and i went to play badminton (yes, again). Today we didn't meet hiong aunties nor their hiong kids, but as we approached the court, came two guys whom we couldn't identify as malay or chinese. Our first impression of them: chao ah bengs who was gonna beat us up if we didn't give way. As the old old old old old saying goes: never judge a book by its cover. bingo. This experience reaffirmed the feasibility of this statement made by some old old old people whom i have no idea who they are. Anyway, the two chao ah bengs turned out to be super nice people and offered to play with us and so we did for an hour and a half. And they turned out to be indonesians. For some reason i could understand a slight bit of what they were saying and bertina deemed me as evil.

Boy are they pro and i feel so siasway and malu-ated. No idea why i've been making weird sounds when i can't return a serve. But there was indeed a lot of laughter. I never realised badminton could bring so much joy and laughter to me. Something very very siasway occured to me. Bertina and i were playing against one of the guys and when i returned a serve with a smack, i hit his vital area. Super siasway.

I've got this very very bad habit of hitting my own left upper arm when i serve with my right. So this morning i woke up with a sore arm and along with it, an orh-cheh, which, in proper english would be a bruise. Then today i developed another bad habit again-i hit my shin when i jump and hit. So i hit the shuttlecock and myself. Masochist.

Anyway i have no idea what was wrong with me today, slightly blur, i went to meet bertina with my two malu-ating plaits and i forgot to remove my contact lens and wear spectacles instead. So i could barely see the shuttlecock when the lights started to light up due to my astigmatism. So i hit a lot a lot of what people call, "airball".

I'm extremely proud of myself as i fried my own prawn rice! =] it's quite nice.
I look forward to badminton tomorrow. =]

i need to improve my english.

I had a real good time @ 7:59 PM
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highlight of the day: i used up 9 packets of tissue in total. i need a new nose.lol

LC was relatively okay. nearly fell asleep. lol.
was telling klyn about some stupid stuff then we laughed and laughed and i ended up in tears.

then on my way home, met 7 ex-classmates: Irfan, Shenghui, Tingyi [which jiemei thought was a big big taboo], Yuxin, Enna, Lingli, Jiemei. Some changed, some didn't. lol.

why am i ending each paragraph with a "lol"? i shall not make this otherwise then. lol.

I had a real good time @ 5:18 PM
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Sunday, July 16, 2006

please ignore this post.

i have totally no idea why but this sudden crave came up to me: to type and type and rant and rant and rant and rant although i have totally nothing to rant about. So i shall simply rant on and on until i have nothing more to say.

Xiong told me yesterday, when we were at mac that i could start designing the camp poster. I whined, but ultimately, i was willing to do it, because it's for SBMY, for buddhism, for Camp Ehi-passiko, and for polishing my photoshop skills. But a part of me fears that i'll lose more sleep, i can't multi-task that well, afterall. Sometimes i doubt my own ability. Actually a lot of other people can do better, i'm only doing it because i'm free enough. What makes me feel utterly devastated is that the designs always appear fine on the computer screen yet when they are on the noticeboards, they suck to the core and i will just be so disappointed with myself. Nevermind, i believe that so long as the passion is there, be it for designing or for Buddhism, i can do it. I won't mind a double passion to motivate me further anyway.

My mom was browsing through the papers and she saw this article about the shortage of speech therapists in singapore as well as in the general global market. and suddenly i realised i actually forgot that i once aspired to be a speech therapist, because this ambition later widened up to become a social worker. Then i realised the University course would only take a span of 2 years. so i gloated as i wouldn't have to study that much. =p kidding. So i thought through what mama said and wondered if i would be patient enough to help my patients. After all, my tolerance level is hopelessly low and i am in desperate need of what you would call, an anger management course. i get heated up before i cool down after a long long long time, think back and realise things can be as simple as ABC.

Similar to the topic on angle properties, you get burnt out, you crumple the paper up, you get so stressed up you burst out crying [or laughing, in my case] and then you give up. after awhile when u look at it again, *poof!* the answer to the question just surfaces in front of you. We can only think clearly with a calm mind. Just like we can only see through water clearly if it's calm and all the residues have settled to the bottom of the glass.

Oh, and our school council president election is nearing. VOTE FOR SCOOBY DOO -Mr Tan Si Ian- !!! hahaha...i'm just publicizing it because i think scooby doo sounds very funny and cute on him. Not that he's cute. the name is. hahaha. ah well.

haven't gotten sufficient sleep this weekend. so i shall stop my nonsensical rantings and go to sleep. nights!

I had a real good time @ 8:52 PM
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My weekend has been very eventful. surprisingly.

nothing much to say about saturday, but today.
morning went to sbm and ate breakfast with mom and dad. haven't eaten breakfast witht them for ages. then had sharing. meditation was good. it felt like without the heavy load and stress, meditation became much earsier and relaxing for me. had to leave sharing for tuition.

tuition was brain-cell killing. like. gosh. physics kills me. so so so complicating. managed to figure out some stuff anyway.

then played badminton with bertina. met with hiong aunties again. haha, this time along with the hiong aunties come their sons, hiong kids. lol. a cup of cooling ribena after the tiring game is indeed a wonderful feeling.

and today i sorted out my thoughts. im findally not confused anymore!

I had a real good time @ 7:06 PM
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Friday, July 14, 2006

已经很久没有以华文来把自己心情记下来了。以前，我总会把每天的心情记在日记本里头，可是如今，已经没有这种习惯了。不知怎么的，突然之间心血来潮，很想很想以华文来抒写今天的心情。真的有点怀念以华语来描写自己的心情的那种滋味，今天就试试看吧，希望我的华文程度没有退步。

记得很久以前，我一直都很想写一篇文章，《雨中抒情》，可是事到如今，我仍没有将那篇文章完成。很久以前，我也将自己的生活化成了一篇小说，可是到现在，小说只有两千多个字，就连一个短篇小说都不如，剩下的部分，还是空着的，已将有大约一年没碰它了。我真是个没毅力的人，做事情只会半途而废。可是，我并不会因此感到难过，因为虽然故事写不完，可是里头，储藏的是我美好的回忆。

“O” 水准的华文口试已经正式结束了。因为和朋友在一起的时候，我们都习惯以英语来沟通，我并不否认心里感到有一点儿害怕，害怕自己不再会讲华语，害怕我会失去华语，毕竟，最的表达我的心意的语文，仍是华语。可是不管怎么说，一想到不用再考口试了，心里的确仿佛放下了一块大石头似的，轻松得很。

这个星期开始时，我一直觉得时间过得非常非常慢，可是眨眼间，今天已经是星期五了。真的感到很高兴，昨天的课外活动过得非常顺利，还好没有把事情都搞砸了。从前的恐惧已经没有那么强烈了，真的很高兴朋友们都不断地鼓励我，帮助我。

就如今年的年头，被派入新的班级时，日子仿佛很辛苦，我也一直想要如何度过漫长的二零零六年，可是在不知不觉中，七个月的时间已经飞快似的流逝了，我也应该开始努力读书了。哈哈。

今天拿回化学的测验成绩，虽然非常满意自己的成绩，可是还是会对自己生闷气，因为由于自己的粗心大意而送走了两分，否则可以得到满分。不管怎么说，下个星期会有一次重考，我一定不会再犯那么愚蠢的错误了。=]

突然之间真的很想看一部电影，想起来，真的好久好久没有踏入戏院的门口了。

我想我就此停笔吧。

I had a real good time @ 3:38 PM
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Wednesday, July 12, 2006

badminton with bertina today was extremely tiring. don't know why either. hand was trembling very badly by the time i got home. maybe 'cos i've been over-exerting it. afterall there are side effects of a fracture.

but i laughed a lot today too. especially in class and during pe. i just laughed and laughed and laughed. along was rosary, charmaine, siian, and occasionally, lyn. i miss the good ol' days that i would laugh all day long. i'm feeling happy that i'm beginning to laugh more and more.

drama commitments have been extremely taxing. loads of paperwork and restructuring is indeed tough. but i swear to hang on real tough and bring EDC to greater heights. i don't know where all these enthusiasm and drive came from, neither do i know how exactly to approach this situation, but i am insistent on making this almost-dead cca a lively one, more than it ever was. i suppose one factor that motivated me was the fact that everyone was happy with the EL shirt--it was a good start, at least.

And i really have to thank estella and bell for their encouragement. despite the fact that they are my juniors, they have been the ones, along with me, encouraging me, giving me loads of suggestions and feedback, what they really feel from the bottom of their hearts. along with that, they have been extremely co-operative. and i really gotta thank the both of you, the fact that you were willing to tell me some of your problems made me feel very comforted, felt like we were back to the OM days a year back. it really boosted my self-confidence, made me realise that i could be a good leader by taking the initiative to approach the others and get to know them better. they will open up, in time to come, and communication would not be a problem within the club. thanks girls. =]

yeps, so i want to make el better. and i will.

I had a real good time @ 8:07 PM
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Tuesday, July 11, 2006

today was definitely a day i would want to remember, because i laughed a lot today.finally managed to.

i laughed with charmaine at the canteen.
i lauged with siian in class.
i laughed with renu during lit
i laughed on my way home with lyn
but beneath those laughter, was doubt and uncertainty.i laughed at my own stupidity
passion is something that is very tough to commit to. you may have a passion for something, but you may not find your objective in commiting to it, because it is a group of people you are dealing with, not just the thing you are passionate about.

was speaking to her. yea. what's my motive, my goal, my objective? i don't know. i don't even know why i'm going. maybe because it has already become a routine of mine. but i'm following it. blindly.

I had a real good time @ 5:19 PM
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I had a real good time @ 5:13 PM
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Monday, July 10, 2006

let's see. today can be considered an extremely bad day and it started right from the middle of the night.

one very nice person by the HONOURABLE name of javier decided to message me about france's defeat to Italy, 5-3 with 4 penalty kicks. yea. i felt like kicking the pillow down the bed at that point in time. it's like. AHHH!!! =[ then i went to school with people shouting into my face that italy won. oh man oh man.

then my math results came back. it was like. ONE OUT OF TEN. hahaha. 'cos i misread the question and plot the points on the wrong axis. oh well.

then eric tan's lesson. boy let's not talk about it because i feel like murdering him.

then alvin told me this sat got the workshop for buddhist youth leader. gah. can't go simlim le.

and i was so elated i could go for the workshop by hossan leong. turned out my Chinese O's oral clashed with it. oh *BLEEP*

nevermind. my el shirts FINALLY came and i love it. loads.

=]

I WANT MY KOKOKRUNCH!!

oh u display picture thief! HUMPH!

I had a real good time @ 7:16 PM
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Saturday, July 08, 2006

i've got something to announce:

MY BUTT HURTS!!

okay, not just me, BBBertina too! side effect of playing badminton with a super hiong auntie on a friday evening.

anyway, anghwee's speech for the house leaders inspired me a lot.
i shall pick myself up. i shall be happy. WHEE!!

i finally finished the e maths part of my holiday homework!
BUT. i'm still left with the A math part. nevermind, i shall think on the bright side. =] at least i'm ahead of others. WAHAHAHA. Oh yes! and i needa thank Wufeng for the truckload of help when i came to number patterns. and maybe zhenfeng and victor teo. [though they didn't help but it's the effort that counts right? LOL]

i wonder how many maths questions i've done. but as i mentioned, well at least i THINK i did, that i'm beginning to like maths again.

yay! me mum just brought in a plate of pineapples!!! =] *jumps around the room*

ok. im going high. haha.

=]
yay. i like the blogskin design. XD

I had a real good time @ 11:30 PM
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Friday, July 07, 2006

this thought popped up in my head suddenly: i need to laugh more.

i miss the days dawn and i would be walking to central, or sitting at one corner of the classroom and laughing for no good reason. but we would just laugh till we tear and as if it was nobody's business though SOME people may be staring at us as if we are nutcases. [perhaps we are]

maybe i used up too much of my serotonin in the past im left with none now. LOL.

ok im slightly high. i don't know why but im in love with maths again.

I had a real good time @ 3:21 PM
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Thursday, July 06, 2006

just as she thought everything was smooth-sailing, the entire world crashed on her-- much more heavier than before.

She was so elated to hear that she could get her seniors their shirt by thursday and the shirts could be their farewell gift. but bad news striked. the shirts couldn't be delivered by thursday, due to a miscommunication. not only did she have to answer to her teacher-in-charge, she also had to answer to all her members. it has been delayed for a long long while. she sunk low into the seat that was supposed to comfortable, but at that point in time it just felt like a quicksand engulfing her.

So she embarked on her journey to carve candles as substitute souvenirs for those leaving. Nodding off, but she still had to do it. She couldn't disappoint her teachers, nor her seniors. Late into the night, she was still sitting alone at the low rosewood coffee table, warming the compass that scalded her hand. but she continued.all was in her mind wad giving her seniors something nice, something that had her sincerity and something that she had put her entire heart into doing.

the next day she dragged herself out of bed. all she was looking forward to was 3pm. but everything just failed. no one knew what they had to do, rather, they forgot.so everything was in chaos. even the teachers were so so disappointed with her as well as her organising committee. she failed to even organise a farewell party.

she was so disappointed at her juniors. one claimed: i just want to come here, eat and go home.

but what nearly put her to tears was that the seniors closest to her gave her a tight hug, told her to work and strive hard. she swore to strive hard with her seniors' words with her, along the long journey.

However, she was feeling very very tired already. along came relationship problems that was extremely taxing for her. she really felt like crying like nothing mattered, but there wasn't a place where she could do so. home wasn't one for her. she didn't know who to turn to. she felt as if she was in this endless maze that she could never get out of.

she had this dream. and she woke up crying. she cried herself back to sleep again.

she couldn't believe she actually told another friend to call her when she's down, when she couldn't handle herself well. she was just so so tired. sometimes she just felt like dying. but she knew she wouldn't. it was just a moment of angst that would creep up on her and she would think that jumping down the building would put an end. she knew that was idiotic. but at least it was a fantasy to let her escape.

how much she wished she could actually live in denial,in her own fantasy island. Yet deep within her she knew that she had to face up to reality and accept the challenges. she would stand up strong. she would.

I had a real good time @ 9:38 PM
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Tuesday, July 04, 2006

Gosh. farewell party is driving me gaga.

longan told me they couldn't come because they had chemistry remedial on thursday.

and know what he was amused at?

quoted from him:*points at my face* hahaha, look at how devastated she looks!

i was on my brink of tears and he actually said that! humph!

I had a real good time @ 5:11 PM
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Monday, July 03, 2006

the morning was horrendous. had to climb outta the comfy bed to fetch the three princesses to my house to do pw after the extremely tiring day at sentosa yesterday. no doubt, yesterday was very fun but it was very exhausting. nearly fell asleep while standing in the train yesterday. so reached home and flopped onto the bed for my sleep. and someone had to SO sadistically sms me to tell me the sbmy peeps are going to watch a movie today. i was jumping around fuming. oh well. call this a series of unfortunate events. [yes, i do not deny *SEE? im NOT living in denial!* that i am so so so gaga and crazy over "a series of unfortunate events"] so project we did.guess i gotta accept the cruel reality that i AM in NHHS cos my mom sent me there and i meet ~~VERY VERY NICE~~ sadistic teachers there who attempts to cover our graves with homework instead of proper soil. i admit that we had loads of fun crapping and doing stupid stuff but at least we managed to complete SOME of the ~~OH-SO-WONDERFUL-STOP-LIVING-IN-DENIAL-YOU-ASSHOLE!~~ disgusting project work. well, one out of three, i mean. pathetic souls. i mean us. rather, me. but in any other way since i live in denial, i became very very high with the other three and yea. you know, high =squeals and screams and laughter and (the list goes on)... although i felt more like crying. gah.

i'm counting down to my chinese o's oral, to put it in simple terms, i'm counting down to my deathday. my mandarin up till now is still horribly CMI [aka ~~can~~ cannot make it]

maybe i may die before that. i don't know what's gonna happen to me when i hand over my report book results to captain alvin. i think i'd better jump into the grave first.

should i crap more? maybe i should. anyway i enjoyed pulling bertina down into the big big big big big big big BIG BIGBIG sea! *GRINS*

WHATEVER LOR! i WILL break your record de lor. *STICKS TONGUE OUT*

I KNOW I SHORT LA. so what? i won't even bother looking at your face, not to mention look up to you, literally. =P yea. damn me right? WHATEVER LOR. wahaha. little KID!

I had a real good time @ 8:34 PM
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